Release Your Victim Identity - Happiness Is Awaiting!

Author: ​Nebo D. Lukovich

Learner, Reader, Student of Life

Nebo D. Lukovich

Image by Tilgnerpictures from Pixabay

​​How many times have you heard: life is so hard; people are selfish; trust no one; it’s his (her) fault…? Very often, for sure. It’s the victim mentality in action. For some people, there is always someone or something to blame.
 
Almost all of us carry within the victim mentality, regardless of gender, profession, age (except for small children), or any other determinant. Taking the form of victim identity and behavior, this mentality very often surfaces in everyday life from the depths of our subconscious minds, bringing us numerous troubles or reinforcing the already existing ones.
 
The victim identity is detrimental to our mental and physical health. However, like every other part of our being, it plays an important role in our maturing and spiritual development.
 
 
Identifying the Victim Identity
 
Perhaps the most difficult part of the process of getting rid of this identity is recognizing it first. How does it manifest? How can we immediately recognize the appearance of the victim identity in everyday life? Here are the most important indicators:

• Blaming other people. Whenever a complaint, gossip, or moan is related to blaming someone, even if it seems completely justified - it is a manifestation of the victim mentality. In that way, the person unconsciously tries to get attention, compassion, support, and validation that someone treated them unfairly, rudely, harshly ... Blaming others is always a sign of the victim identity.
• Blaming oneself. Often a person in the victim identity does not blame other people, but herself instead. An emotion of guilt for deeds she apparently did or did not commit overwhelms her completely. She is in a state of self-pity in its extreme form. She intensely complains about it to other people (although sometimes she keeps everything to herself). Such complaints are also very dangerous for a person's mental stability and overall health.
• Blaming the circumstances. Many people also frequently complain about life difficulties that have befallen them. In this case, the person does not put blame on himself or other people. He instead blames the circumstances and hardships in his life. However, it is still a form of the victim identity, where the “victim” consciously or unconsciously blames life, God, the universe, society, unfortunate events, etc.

 
Therefore, the core attribute of victim identity is blaming.
 
The “victim” typically says to himself or others:

• I can't.
• Life is hard.
• Life is a struggle.
• I am always a victim.
• I always have problems.
• People are selfish.
• You can't trust people.
• Others are better than me.
• Beware of deception; it's everywhere.
• Everyone is always picking on me.
• You don't understand how hard it is for me.

The core attribute of victim identity is blaming.

​Subconscious Causes of the Victim Mentality

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