One of the most difficult obstacles to true forgiveness is our conscious or subconscious intention to change the people who have been hurting us.
 
This is wrong! It is not up to us to change anyone. We must change ourselves instead. Only in this way can we truly influence others.
 
Let's say you have just forgiven your brother for hurting you. At least you think you have forgiven him. Alas, he hurts you again tomorrow in the same way and you get angry once more. Obviously, you have not forgiven him, otherwise, you wouldn't have become triggered by his behavior again. 
 
What was wrong with your forgiveness?
 
We all want to change others, more or less. So, yes, we forgive them, but only for a particular action under certain circumstances. For this time only. But what about the future?
 
Although we seemingly forgave them, subconsciously we expected them to change. We thought they are the one who should have changed, not us.
 
They won't. Actually, they will, but at their own pace and in their own way, but it's not up to us.
 
We must presume that the person is going to endlessly and perpetually cause us pain and forgive them despite that! 
 
Of course, easier said than done. Nevertheless, try this: imagine that the person you want to forgive will be hurting you endlessly. Assume that they are so stubborn that they are never going to change their behavior; that they will never transform into a better version of themselves. Imagine clearly that they will try to hurt you tomorrow even more. Suppose that he or she is unable to improve in any way. On the contrary, they may only become worse and worse and there's no end to this. ​

Now, forgive them as such! Can you do that? Do you really want to get rid of this burden, to get your life force back?
 
Forgive this person as though they are going to worsen their behavior towards you, increasingly, forever. Do you possess such capacity, such depth of your character? If you do, congratulations – that's true forgiveness. If you don't – never mind. Do not judge yourself, we are all human beings. But the same problem will reappear.
 
So, try again.
 
Know that all your bad circumstances, all the people around you who are making you suffer, are all there for the purpose of your growth. From every such experience, you may extract some unique and truly valuable life lessons.
 
Your worst enemies or the most stubborn and annoying friends are in fact your greatest teachers! Perhaps they agreed with you before this lifetime to make such a great sacrifice for you, that now you even consider them enemies or bad people, all with the goal of enabling you to learn the hardest life lesson - to truly forgive. Is there any greater sacrifice than that?
 
For example, if your friend constantly gets into the same troubles while stubbornly and bluntly refusing your advice, and it's all annoying to you, stop trying to change her. Change yourself instead. Find within your own being the very trait that annoys you the most in her behavior. Although not being aware of that, she is actually teaching you, she is pointing to the important aspect of your personality you have to deal with now.
 
And forgive her, truly and completely, with all your heart. Imagine that she will never, never change, that she is going to worsen instead and to annoy you for the rest of this life and…forgive her despite that!
 
For the very act of forgiveness, to learn how to do it, you may use various techniques or approaches described in another article. But remember, only when you succeed in this kind of “eternal forgiveness,” have you truly let go, you are free. 
 
Don't forget that forgiveness is a process. You will probably have to forgive many aspects of the other person's unwanted behavior, as though they are all permanent.
 
The same stands for any situation, circumstance, or thing in your life that brings you suffering. Accept it, forgive it totally, even though it is presumably going to persist as such eternally! If you are able to do this, you have truly learned forgiveness. ​

It's always easier to define mental illness than determining mental health; Mental health refers to a person's cognitive, behavioral, and emotional state; it comprises everything about how people feel, think, and behave. Mental health can affect the daily routine, physical fitness, and relationship with people. Mental health preserves the ability of a person to enjoy life and enables the person to create the balance between activities, responsibilities, and efforts to achieve daily psychological resilience.

A condition such as anxiety, depression, and stress affects mental health and disturbs daily living. Mental health basics refer to the state of a person to realize their own ability to overcome the everyday anxiety of life to be productive and contribute towards the community. Having good mental health relatively develops a healthy and happy life. Your mental health gets affected by many factors such as biological factors, family history of mental health, and even our genes.

Things that can help you develop a healthy state of mind are:

• Developing a positive attitude
• Keeping yourself positively active
• Getting a maximum sleep for 8 hours
• Developing healthy eating habits
• Seeking professional help for your mental health, if needed
• Being socially active with people you feel comfortable
• Developing skills to overcome your problems

 
Early Warnings For Mental Health Problems
 
There are times when we are not aware that we are living with mental health problems. Here are a few common behaviors that a person develops as an early warning sign:

• Pushing people and usual activities away
• Experiencing energy loss
• Creating a negative attitude towards things
• Un-experienced pains and aches
• Feeling severe mood swings such as confused, forgetful, angry, upset, scared, or worried
• Developing suicidal or self-harming thoughts
• Developing addictive habits such as smoking, drinking, or drugs more than usual.

Recognizing the early stage of mental health problems makes it easy to cope and get back to everyday life.


Characteristics Of Mental Health
 
Satisfaction of life:
Mental health and ability indicate the frequency of a person enjoying life. Some factors that play an essential role in life satisfaction include the absence of sickness, good relationships, the sense of being active in personal and professional life, and a feeling of hope.
 
Resilience:
People with resilience have the quality to develop positive views to cope with challenges and seek out support when needed; those who are more resilient not only easily cope with stress but are even able to face it strongly.
 
Social support:
Social support acts as one of the most important elements for a healthy state of mind. There are cases that have proven the harmful effects of loneliness on health. The negative impact refers to physical and mental health, including depression, memory issues, addictions, and slow functioning of the brain. A decrease in a person's social support leads to job-hopping, affecting personal relationships, social diversities, which has a mental impact on health.
 
Flexibility:
Having rigid expectations from things develops the feeling of stress in the mind. A bit of emotional flexibility is essential to give an experience of heavy emotions and express themselves. Lack of mental flexibility links to a certain kind of psychopathology, whereas flexibility connects you to a better and improved life.


Effects Of Continuous Pressure On Mental Health

​There are many definitions of gratitude. Most of them describe this emotion as an appreciation for what we receive from others. However, such a view is somewhat narrow in the context of the actual topic of this article.
 
Viewed more broadly, gratefulness is related not only to receiving help, gifts, or praises from other people, but to a state of appreciation for our own deeds, traits, and accomplishments. Through gratitude, we learn to appreciate all we have already become and what we achieved in life.
 
Gratitude emphasizes goodness. When we are grateful, we focus on who we are and what we have achieved, rather than always putting most of our attention to numerous negativities in our life.
 
 
What are the benefits of gratitude?
 
No doubt, gratitude is one of the most beneficial states of being. As a personal growth practice, its effects are powerful and profound, and are similar to those of meditation, mindfulness, prayer, yoga, and forgiveness.
 
There is plenty of scientific research that strongly confirms the numerous and somewhat surprising benefits of gratitude. Regularly practiced, it will have a huge, positive impact on our personality. It will significantly improve our emotional and social life, career, and health. Concretely, this emotion:

• Increases happiness
• Improves physical and mental health
• Improves relationships
• Enhances well-being
• Improves self-control
• Improves self-esteem
• Increases mental strength
• Improves sleep
• Enhances empathy
• Reduces aggression
• Enhances optimism
• Reduces blood pressure
• Helps people recover from substance misuse

 
Indeed, plenty of reasons to be grateful!

​How to practice gratitude?
 
There are so many ways to do this practice. The key is, of course, to incite the very feeling of gratefulness as strongly and deeply as possible, using various techniques and approaches.
 
For example, every morning (after getting up) and evening (before sleep), you may think of three to five concrete things that you are grateful for. You may be thankful for small things that make you happy at the moment, like a morning cup of coffee, or your child’s hug. You could feel gratitude for some of your basic aspects of life, like your very existence, body, having eyesight, the beating heart, breath, two hands and two legs, being healthy, aware, and sane. Or, you can be appreciative for your children, family, relationships, spiritual practice, romantic love, wealth, accomplishments, education, creativity, ability to deeply love and feel compassion, good habits, and so on.
 
It is also a good idea to put on paper all your reasons for gratitude each time you do this practice.
 
Another way of developing the feeling of gratefulness is to follow gratitude prompts. The prompts allow you to identify all the things you are grateful for. You simply have to fill in the blanks. The prompts cover multiple senses, colors, people, and things. The goal is to identify at least three things in each category that you are thankful for.
 
The prompts include:

• I’m grateful for three things I hear:
• I’m grateful for three things I see:
• I’m grateful for three things I smell:
• I’m grateful for three things I feel:
• I’m grateful for these three things I taste:
• I’m grateful for these three emotions:
• I’m grateful for these three events:
• I’m grateful for these three friends:
• I’m grateful for these three family members:
• I’m grateful for these three things in my home:
• I’m grateful for these three accomplishments:
• I’m grateful for these three traits:
• Etc.

 
Or, you can make your own gratitude statements. Here are some examples of such statements:
-       I’m so grateful for my life (or existence).
-       Thank you God for keeping me and my family alive and healthy. 
-       Thank you angels for the incessant flow of inspiration I am blessed with.
-       I'm so thankful to those who love me and accept me for who I am.
-       I’m grateful for this wonderful cup of coffee.
-       I’m so thankful for my children’s happiness.
-       I’m so grateful for my spouse’s smile and laughter.
-       Thank you, Universe for fulfilling my desire for success.
-       I feel gratitude for my job and regular salaries.
-       I am thankful to myself for finishing this project.
-       Thank you, my dear body, for serving me faithfully all these years.
 
This list could be endless. There are so many reasons for being grateful all the time.

​To whom should we be grateful?

​​Beginner’s mind is a state of consciousness in which the mind is completely open, without any preconceptions about people, events, surroundings, or anything else.  It is an incredible state of novelty, awe, and curiosity.
 
Entering the state of beginner’s mind is one of the cornerstones in several spiritual traditions, especially in Zen Buddhism. However, it is not important for religion only; it is one of the key practices for spiritual development and personal growth in general, even for some atheistic or agnostic practitioners. Similar to mindfulness, beginner’s mind brings about deep inner peace; it opens up the sacred heart and its ability for love and compassion; it activates creativity and unveils numerous hidden gifts.
 
How do we grow beginner’s mind and make it take deep roots in our everyday life? Simply, we need to learn how to enter this state of consciousness first and to practice it persistently. 

Typically, the practitioner should enter the present moment. They have to intentionally put aside all preconceptions about the current situation; to pretend that they know virtually nothing about it; to feel genuine curiosity; to willingly observe everything as they are seeing it for the first time in their life.  
 
Nevertheless, for some people, this practice can be insufficient for developing a strong and enduring foundation for a pure, innocent state of mind. That's why everyday meditation sessions are critical. And I am going to introduce you here to a completely new kind of meditation that will not only take you into the state of beginner’s mind but will also, if practiced steadily, help you expand your consciousness in many ways.
 
We will name it ‘Alien Meditation,’ because you will first imagine yourself as an extraterrestrial being in an alien environment, so that your real human body and everyday surrounding seem strange and new, at least for a while.
 
Practicing this meditation will enable you to delve deeply into the profound state of beginner’s mind, while your consciousness and creativity will be expanding tremendously.

Your home should be your safe haven -- the place where you feel relaxed, happy, and at peace. But when bad energy is lingering around, your home can quickly become the complete opposite -- a place of hostility and negativity. And when you have this negative energy in your home, it can affect every other aspect of your life. That’s why house cleansing can be an important part in your personal well-being. 
​
If you’ve just moved into a new space, you should cleanse your home of any negative energies that might still be there from the previous owners. Or, if you’ve just gone through a breakup, had a big life transition, or you’re just in a funk -- clearing bad energy from your home can help. But how do you know if you have negative energy in your home, and how do you clear it out? 

Signs you have bad energy in your home

Knowing how to detect negative energy in your house can actually be quite simple. You can tell whether the energy in your home is good or bad – or neutral – based on the way you feel inside while you’re inside it. A house filled with good energy feels fresh and vibrant -- it’s full of life and you feel good being there. Some may say it has good qi or feng shui. On the other end of the spectrum, a home drowning in bad energy will make you feel like you’re being stifled, smothered, or even crushed. You can feel the tension in the air, and there are a thousand places you’d rather be.

Negative energy and stress go hand-in-hand, so if you’re constantly frazzled or at the end of your rope, your home could be partly to blame. If you’re not sure whether your home has bad energy of its own, check out these red flags:

• Excessive complaining. If you or your family members catch yourselves complaining, even when things are okay (or worse, when they’re actually pretty good), you may have negative energy in your home. The same is true if you’re struggling to find positivity in life.
• Negative relationships. When the people around you – spouses, children, family, and friends – are negative, it’s worth taking a look at the kind of energy you’re putting out there. Negative energy attracts more negative energy, and it becomes a vicious cycle.
• The blame game. Household members always pointing the finger? Negative energy in the home could be preventing them (and you) from looking inward to place responsibility where it really belongs.
• Criticism. If there’s a lot of criticizing going along with all the blame, your home could be swamped with bad energy. When you or others in your house send out negative vibrations, you’re increasing the bad energy in your home.
• Clutter. One of the biggest signs of negative energy in a home is clutter. Clutter blocks the way energy flows through a home, so it could be keeping bad energy in and making things worse.

Even if you aren’t picking up on any of these warning signs that you’re dealing with bad energy, it’s a good idea to cleanse your house when someone has had an argument, been sick, or is experiencing stress at work. Negative energy can seep into your house over time, so it’s okay to clear it whenever you feel like doing so.

Your home is the one place you should feel safe and secure, but if you open the door and you’re practically swimming in a pool of bad energy, you need to cleanse it – and this checklist will help.