Many people have a problem of succumbing to the demands of others repeatedly and are afraid of saying no. They feel that it may hurt the other person and provoke revenge. Or, they are afraid of themselves and their own reactions in a possible conflict.
On the other hand, saying yes to others seems to be ingrained in our nature as an effective evolutionary strategy. It allowed our ancestors to support each other and jointly defend themselves from various threats. Also, a genuine yes to people and circumstances generally is a good thing, which means accepting the present moment as it is. However, agreeing with all external requests would have been the perfect strategy if all people were genuine and honest. Unfortunately, that’s not the case. Often burdened with heavy negative emotions, many individuals may behave egotistically and even cunningly toward us. If we are always naively open to their demands, they will inevitably hurt us. I am sure you are familiar with that feeling, unfortunately. Many times, all of us were betrayed or hurt unexpectedly, even by our close friends or relatives. Our life experience tells us that we should always be alert and cautious to avoid such unpleasant surprises. The problem is that we habitually say no out from fear or anger. Also, we say yes frequently from fear or desire. So, the root of our reactions, whether “positive” or “negative” ones, is at least very questionable. The underlying source of our reactions is our ego. Typically, we don’t respond. We react. That’s a big difference. Saying No and Saying Yes Therefore, if we want to learn how to genuinely say no to other people’s demands, we should examine the complementary action – saying yes. Those are the two opposites that are inseparable. Acceptance and denial, submission and refusal, agreement and dissent, yes and no; they are two sides of the coin. They must be taken into consideration together. Only from the state of Pure Consciousness, we can respond genuinely to every challenge. Pure Consciousness, or Presence, will truly enable us to either accept or refuse the requests of others. On the other hand, if we are burdened by thoughts and emotions, our choices will be clouded and distorted. The genuine decisions are made only from the state of Presence, the thoughtless state of mind. However, even if we learn to live in the here and now, to be mindful most of the time, we still could react improperly in numerous circumstances. Some persons or occasions may easily kick us out from the state of Presence. Their actions or mere appearance could trigger our previously suppressed emotions such as anger, fear, or sorrow, so our reaction to their requirements will not be genuine. Whether that reaction is submission or refusal, it will not be authentic. In the long run, its consequences will be suffering. The genuine decisions are made only from the state of Presence, the thoughtless state of mind.
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“To err is human; to forgive, divine.” – From the poem An Essay on Criticism, by Alexander Pope
The importance of forgiveness is immense. Whenever we are stuck in the mud of anger, resentment, blame, or guilt, we deeply suffer, as well as people around us. Although these feelings are not negative per se, they are conveyors of some vital messages to our conscious being. If neglected, they will severely undermine our health and overall well-being. To forgive means to release anger and resentment, lastingly. So, together with love, forgiveness is the ultimate healing tool on Earth. It liberates us directly from these unpleasant feelings, while, indirectly, it heals many diseases caused by them. To forgive means to release anger and resentment, lastingly.
Also, it does not involve excusing or condoning the person’s actions. Forgiveness does not deny crime, atrocity, or injustice. However, it clears up our hearts and minds, making the path to justice completely smooth. It brings relief from pain and injury.
Forgiveness does not necessarily lead to reconciliation, nor we have to feel obliged to reconcile with the person we are forgiving. Nevertheless, if we truly forgive the person, some sort of reconciliation with them is likely to spontaneously occur, sooner or later. True forgiveness cannot be achieved from a lofty, righteous position. This implies feeling superior upon the other person, which could easily turn into disdain. And that would be very dangerous for our spiritual growth. How to forgive? Of course, to us ordinary mortals, forgiveness is not easy at all. The feelings that we intend to release are usually deeply rooted and most often for a long time present in our psyche. Anyway, if we want to continue with our personal development and spiritual growth, we must reintegrate these feelings with the rest of our being. Therefore, forgiveness should be done step-by-step, thoroughly, with true dedication and honesty.
“This too shall pass.” - Unknown author
Why should we work on ourselves? What is the ultimate goal of such work? It’s simple: to achieve permanent happiness. Or at least, to become much happier than our “normal life” offers. Even if our reason is curiosity or spiritual drive for the Truth, that’s again sort of happiness. One might say that there are so many other methods to become happy, at least for a while. You can be happy by falling in love, exercising, eating, playing football, talking with your best friend, or doing countless other things. But, the emphasis here is on “for a while.” It won’t last long enough. And when such happiness passes away, there comes its opposite – suffering of various kinds. But that’s kind of expected result. Falling in love or eating – that’s not inner work at all. On the other hand, even the sincerest self-improvement work will bring about some amount of pain into our lives. These difficulties are often unexpected so that we can talk about the side effects of inner work. What is the inner work in the first place? It is a broad and fuzzy term. Many teachers and practitioners differ significantly on its meaning; however, I will describe it as conscious effort invested into achieving an ultimate spiritual goal or psychological development, on a regular basis. True inner work must be comprehensive. It should include investing efforts toward spiritual liberation, developing love and presence, fulfilling and harmonizing goals, doing psychological work, and adhering to ethical standards. Otherwise, the achieved happiness won’t last much. Or all achievements will be accompanied by a lot of suffering. However, even when you think you have covered all these areas with your work, you will still suffer from time to time. That’s inevitable until you reach the final liberation, or Nirvana as Buddhists call it. Difficulties of Meditation Some of the approaches mentioned above are in fact paths to Pure Consciousness, or Presence – meditation sittings, mindfulness, self-inquiry…and they all are inevitably accompanied by many unpleasant side-effects. Whether you are trying to experience Truth through the process of self-inquiry or to empty your mind and live in the here and now through some form of meditation and mindfulness, you will unavoidably encounter many difficulties along that way. You will be uncovering a lot of previously suppressed emotions, long-forgotten decisions, deep-rooted beliefs, traumatic childhood experiences, fears, resentment, or other hidden mind contents. Even if you are simply trying to wake up pure love in your heart, you will also meet various unpleasant reactions from within. During the meditation and mindfulness work your mind and body purify progressively. But there is a problem. As more and more layers of the subconscious mind are being removed, old, deeper structures that were mentioned above, emerge inevitably. As you are digging ever deeper into the microcosm of your psyche, any of these can be exposed to the light of your consciousness and triggered off unexpectedly. As more and more layers of the subconscious mind are being removed, old, deeper structures emerge inevitably.
These unconscious structures can appear in diverse ways. They might manifest within your mind or physical body, so you could, for example, become depressed, anxious, over-reactive, or even physically ill. But if you are very stable mentally and fit physically, these long-suppressed subconscious contents will instead emerge in the outside world. You may experience all kinds of troubles, such as sudden accidents, serious disputes with your loved ones, or even attacks by total strangers.
It’s like the stillness within is telling us: OK, you are able to remain calm during your meditation sittings, when you walk, or during your chores. But are you able to maintain your stillness in this situation? Or: OK, you can feel deep love of these people in those circumstances. But is your love really that well-founded? Can you love this person in this situation? And you get the challenge to deal with. Only when you become able to deal with them appropriately, such people and circumstances will not appear in your life anymore. Difficulties of Goal Achievement Work Generally speaking, work on goals is even trickier than meditation or mindfulness. For a goal or intention to be fully accomplished, it must be: 1) Determined, 2) Without much resistance from your other goals and various parts of your personality, and 3) To be “immersed” into the state of Presence or Pure Consciousness before its manifestation. Therefore, you have to be very careful during any goal achievement work. Almost every goal carries with it a cluster of various desires, negative beliefs, emotions, and decisions, that are in fact obstacles to the goal’s manifestation. Also, there is always some amount of misalignment or disharmony with other important goals that you want to achieve or with many other parts of your personality. This conflict will produce friction and pain. To attain the goal, most of these subconscious obstacles and all disharmonious tendencies must be removed peacefully, for example through some form of the Reintegration process. Difficulties of Psychological Work This is also a wide area. Psychoanalysis, Transpersonal psychology, Personality psychology, Transaction Analysis, NLP, Reintegration System, etc. – all have quite different approaches, but demand a lot of work anyway. Typically, these types of inner work are not about Pure Consciousness, nor achieving goals. They direct you toward the transformation or integration of various parts of your psyche. Still, they may also trigger numerous disturbing side-effects. During such work, some aspects of personality are changing, realigning, or reconfiguring. There will be a lot of friction among them until a new mutual equilibrium is established. That friction unavoidably generates suffering, which can be expressed in many ways, too. Any kind of unexpected physical or emotional troubles may appear. All sorts of unpleasant experiences may arise in your external reality, in forms of aggressive people, sad events, dangerous accidents or anything else.
Sometimes we say life is hard, and it would be much better if we were born as a cat, dog or some other animal that does not have problems and worries in its simple life. Still, if we really had that opportunity, very few of us would actually accept it. We admire our minds and appreciate our self-awareness greatly.
But what is self-awareness in the first place? It is the capacity of an individual to recognize oneself as a separate entity, distinct from the environment and other individuals. While consciousness means to be aware of the environment, self-awareness purports the individual’s ability to fully comprehend their permanent self and the environment. It is worth noting that some sources make a distinction between the terms self-awareness and self-consciousness, where the latter is defined as the capacity of the individual to see oneself not only as a separate being, as seen from a first-person view, but to understand that other beings are also aware of them. However, self-awareness and self-consciousness are used as synonyms in this article. While consciousness means to be aware of the environment, self-awareness purports the individual’s ability to fully comprehend their permanent self and the environment.
Number of Living Beings
Think about this: What is the chance of existing as a self-conscious being, among countless other living entities? Can you get an even slightest idea of how many other beings exist in the universe (or maybe multiverse), and how enormous that number is, even compared to 7.2 billion humans currently living on earth? Animals, plants, bacteria, viruses… they are all conscious to some degree, meaning, aware of their surroundings. And considering the vastness of space of the cosmos, the number of living creatures with some level of consciousness is truly incomprehensible. Let us see what would be that number for this planet only. According to some estimates, the total number of prokaryotes (e.g., bacteria) on earth is 5 x 1030 (five billion billion trillion), which is 5 followed by 30 zeros. This is just a rough estimate. As the biomass of all other species is by several orders of magnitude smaller, we could assume that this number covers the vast majority of biomass on earth, including oceans. The number of living creatures with some level of consciousness is truly incomprehensible.
Who am I? …or… What am I? ...or even… Am I?
These are the ultimate questions of our existence. Is there anybody on this world who has not asked themselves one of these questions at least once in their lifetime? Anyway, for most of us, it would be awesome to reveal answers to these most profound questions. But why should anyone bother with such questions at all? The self-inquiry should be self-sufficient per se, with no external benefits. There is no goal to it, except for revealing our true nature. The practice of self-inquiry naturally occurs when an individual reaches spiritual maturity, which genuinely accelerates their pursuit toward the ultimate Truth. An inner urge for self-realization spontaneously arises. Enlightenment is going to happen, of its own accord and that should be sufficient as such. However, there is even more to that. The practice of self-inquiry naturally occurs when an individual reaches spiritual maturity.
Are There Benefits of Self-Inquiry?
Yes, there indeed are significant side-benefits of such a practice. If you are doing the self-inquiry on a regular basis, you might experience some profound changes in your life, similar to those of “normal” meditation sittings or mindfulness practice. For example, you might:
If you are doing the self-inquiry on a regular basis, you might experience some profound changes in your life, similar to those of “normal” meditation sittings or mindfulness practice.
But the most precious gain of this practice could be out of any concept of benefit whatsoever: The Ultimate Truth.
The Technique of Self-Inquiry Now, let us dive into the nuts-and-bolts of self-inquiry. You may be doing it by following these steps:
Here is a more detailed explanation of each step. 1. Enter the state of Presence. Just be here and now. Accept any external impressions, or internal sensations, emotions or thoughts that may arise. For that purpose, you may apply the Dissolving the Temporary I technique, which will take you directly to the boundless state of Pure Consciousness, or Presence. 2. Turn your attention inward and ask the question: What is present? Note that the question begins with what instead of who. Of course, you may ask the “classical” question Who am I? and might end up with the same result. However, what doesn't imply any identity, while who does. In this process, identities are the obstacles to the Truth, so we aim to release all our identities to experience the essence of our being.
We are living in a time of gadgets. Smartphones, tablets, laptops, TV, smart watches, and many other “smart” things are indisputably helpful in many tasks we are facing every day. However, all these gadgets are, at the same time, great soakers of our attention and energy, often being extremely addictive.
To many of us, building the daily habit of meditation sittings is a challenging task. Even if we establish it, we might be often distracted by many external influences, including electronic devices. When we are watching something on the device’s display, we are in fact totally immersed in that content. Our attention is entirely absorbed by the games, movies, music, images, or anything else emerging from that shiny rectangle. Our life energy is drained, and we often feel exhausted after a few hours of such an activity. And much of our free time we spend immersed in endless contents these devices offer. We have become the society of gadget-addicts. Wouldn't be awesome if we could reverse this situation somehow? Is it possible to actually transform all these gadgets into gateways to conscious living? Of course it is. Is it possible to actually transform all these gadgets into gateways to conscious living? Of course it is.
Smartphone Meditation
One of the ways to turn this immersing habit into a portal to inner freedom is this meditation. Here are the steps you may follow:
Before you begin, it is necessary to become familiar with the terms “physical attention” and “mental attention.” By physical attention, we mean to direct our eyes toward something in front of us. On the other hand, mental attention implies an intense awareness of something, which means focusing our mind on that (regardless of our eyes’ direction). 1. Focusing on the phone’s frame You can begin this meditation in whatever position or situation you find yourself in. Whether you are sitting, lying down, or standing, you can do this brief exercise, as long as you hold the phone or some other device in your hand. First, while still looking at the phone’s screen, become aware of its frame or bezels. Extend your mental attention on the frame. Remember, your eyes are physically still directed toward the center of the device’s display, while you are becoming more aware of the device’s edges. If a thought or emotion arises, just accept it. If you find a related tension in your body – accept that as well, and return to meditation. 2. Sensing the phone Now, while still being aware of the phone’s edges, become aware of the gadget as a whole. As you are holding it, feel its surface and weight. So, your mental attention should now encompass the phone’s display, the edges, and your senses of its surface and weight. All the while, keep your physical attention on the screen.
What is Consciousness?
To discuss the great mystery of gaps in consciousness and their meaning, we should define what is consciousness in the first place. Most of the scientific authorities agree it is a state of awareness of one’s environment and an ability to respond to various external stimuli. In a broader sense, we can even include awareness of self, which implies the state of being self-conscious. From a spiritual point of view, consciousness is impersonal and inherently independent of mind, body, matter, energy, space and time. Related to that, consciousness can be unlimited, which is its true nature, or seemingly limited. Unlimited consciousness is actually the Primordial Oneness, infinite, omnipresent, eternal, without any boundaries of mind, space and time. On the other hand, limited consciousness is apparently constricted to the dynamic points of view. The word “dynamic” here indicates moving by the limitations of space and time. We, as conscious beings, or any other conscious entities, are examples of limited consciousness. Indeed, during our wakeful time, our consciousness is severely confined by space-time. So, by the gaps in consciousness, we mean discontinuities in the stream of limited consciousness, with no memories of these periods whatsoever. By the gaps in consciousness, we mean discontinuities in the stream of limited consciousness, with no memories of these periods whatsoever.
Continuity and Discontinuity of Consciousness
The discontinuous nature of our everyday consciousness is evident. Indeed, there are many gaps in our awareness. For example, we sleep regularly, and the state of deep sleep naturally interrupts our conscious presence. There are also other states of mind in which we are not aware at all – coma, vegetative state, anesthesia, etc. Note that in our awake time there are many smaller and unnoticeable discontinuities of our awareness during so-called visual saccades (quick movements of eyes between phases of fixation in the same direction) when our conscious responsiveness is turned off. Nevertheless, these small but frequent blackouts are very hard to notice, and there is always a pretty firm notion of the continuity in awareness. What happens with consciousness during all these discontinuities? Does it simply disappear, or something happens but we don’t retain any memory of that? Windows to Oneness Consciousness cannot be absent. It cannot disappear. It cannot be annihilated as it is present everywhere, in everything. It is impossible for us to become nothingness in the nihilistic sense if something conscious is already there. That’s why those continuity gaps are, in fact, windows to the higher levels of our existence or even to the Primordial Oneness. And those discontinuities are persistently repetitive. From the point of view of our limited minds, during the continuity gaps such as deep sleep, there is no consciousness, no time, so we merely jump on to the next period of being conscious. From a broader perspective, the gaps are only occurring from the vantage point of our limited consciousness, not within the unlimited consciousness. As said before, consciousness cannot ever be absent, anywhere. So, in these periods, our limited point of view shifts to its background consciousness, or “ancestral consciousness.” Our limited, individual consciousness becomes one with the much broader consciousness of our Soul, which is aware of many other lives or existences which we can consider as “ours,” and the continued conscious existence between these lives. To be more precise, during our continuity gaps, we experience all other lives or continual points of view of our higher-level ancestral being, or our Soul. But there is no memory of that when we awaken to the normal state of consciousness. During our continuity gaps, we experience all other lives or continual points of view of our higher-level ancestral being, or our Soul. But there is no memory of that when we awaken to the normal state of consciousness.
Beings at All Levels of Existence Also Experience Discontinuities
Our Higher Self, or Soul, despite its much broader vantage point, is also a limited entity. Therefore, it must have analogous gaps in their consciousness’ continuity. Similar to our everyday life, from the point of view of our Higher Self, there are no discontinuities in consciousness at all. Our Soul merely skips the time of the gap. But, from an even broader perspective, there are such periods of our Soul’s life. In those interruptions, the Infinite Consciousness experiences the conscious time of an even higher-level ancestral being (higher Soul). Still, there is no memory of these experiences. How many higher levels of our existence are there? It’s a mystery. However, the Primordial Oneness is the highest level of consciousness, and it experiences all at once, outside of space-time continuum and has the knowledge of everything and everyone. In those discontinuities of the stream of consciousness, our individual point of view, regardless its level, sometimes completely dissolves and our consciousness even merges with the Unlimited Consciousness, the Primordial Oneness. That consciousness experiences everything and anything instantly, in no time and no space. Therefore, it knows everything; it takes all possible points of view in all universes ever. This is the most natural state of Being. Hence, during the continuity gaps we are not staring the face of God – in fact, we are becoming God, or the Primordial Oneness. During some of those gaps, the Unlimited Consciousness, or Primordial Oneness, experiences all the lives of all conscious entities, including their past and future span, within the entirety of Existence. In all of those lives, similar continuity gaps are also happening myriads of times, which also allow experiences of all other existences, including this one. Yet, there is no memory of that when we awaken. During these discontinuities we are not staring the face of God – in fact, we are becoming God, or the Primordial Oneness.
The Memory as the Key to Individual Life
Our consciousness is constricted to this specific point of view of this concrete person. It depends on time and memory. Since there is no time during these gaps, there could be no memory of any experience within the gaps. The individual life continues as there are no memories of other points of view which were experienced. The only memory present in the normal state of consciousness is that of this particular individual existence. So, there is an absolute impression of our personal continuity. We, as God, or the Primordial Oneness, are experiencing all other points of view in all universes during the continuity gaps. Every one of us, as a particular being, seemingly experiences a continuous lifetime because of the lack of memory of neither of those lifetimes. That’s why the gaps in the apparent stream of our everyday consciousness are critical. From “time” to “time,” we return to our creator, become one with Him or Her, and deeply refresh and re-vitalize our illusionary existence. These discontinuities are not only inevitable; they are essential for our life and spiritual growth.
Take full responsibility for your own life. That’s one of the fundamental principles of the Reintegration System, and one of the direct implications of the so-called Holographic Principle.
Holographic point of view can sound bizarre to our rational mind. It depicts the phenomenon of any provisional part containing complete information about the bigger system which it belongs to. In other words, we, as parts of the Universe, have within us all information about the Universe. That also means that we are the Universe. We are the source. And this implicates that we are responsible for everything, as we are the source. But what exactly does “taking full responsibility for our life” mean? It does not mean to take full control, nor it implicates blaming ourself for anything. It merely means to truly acknowledge and feel that we are the genuine source of all events in our life that are of any personal significance to us. To be fully responsible for life can also have two meanings: one is responsible for their own individual reality (limited responsibility) or the entire Universe (Existence). These meanings stem from two interpretations of the Holographic Principle: limited and total view. Two Points of View of the Holographic Principle According to the Limited View of the Holographic Principle, all entities are symbolically volumes with their surfaces. Those surfaces have all information on the volumes. On the other hand, the Total View of the Holographic Principle assumes that the entire Existence is inherently indivisible, so every entity has complete information on the Existence. First, here are some thoughts on the “limited” interpretation. The Holographic view of the universe has been relatively recently proposed by several renowned theoretical physicists (Leonard Susskind, Stanford University; Charles Thorn, University of Florida; Gerard 't Hooftand, Utrecht University; and several others) that were exploring string theory and an information paradox related to black holes.[1] The outcome of their analysis was: the surface of any volume contains all the information about that very volume. In other words, all particles, structures, or events within a limited volume of space-time are mirrored on the surface of that volume, and vice versa. Now, this leads us to a significant consequence to our everyday life. For us, if our being is a kind of the “volume,” what would be its “surface”? It is the external world that we perceive. [1] Reference: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holographic_principle All particles, structures, or events within a limited volume of space-time are mirrored on the surface of that volume, and vice versa.
The reality is being experienced through our senses, on the “surface” of our being. So, our individual experience of the outer reality is that surface! Therefore, the outer reality and our inner being must correspond to each other. Each has complete information on the other. Whatever is inside our being, is perfectly mirrored in our external world, although in a strange and symbolical way. Note that this relates to our individual reality only, not to the whole universe.
However, the Limited View of the Holographic Principle has an inevitable consequence: every human being is fully responsible for their individual life, in all its aspects. The Limited View of the Holographic Principle has an inevitable consequence: every human being is fully responsible for their individual life, in all its aspects.
The second and much broader way of thinking about the Holographic Principle is the “total approach.” It originates from the idea of indivisibility of the Primordial Oneness (or the Source, God). As the Primordial Oneness is not prone to any division due to its very nature (oneness), any limited entity or structure is actually an illusion, and it still equals to the same Primordial Oneness.
This also means that any entity potentially has the entire information within itself on the whole Existence. Although it is hard to believe in this, there is a possibility to extract any information from any subject, as that subject is an illusion and there is only Oneness, which is independent of the space-time limitations. Chief consequences of the “total approach” to the Holographic Principle are: We are one. Inherently, we are the Primordial Oneness, God. And yes, we are responsible for the whole of Existence. Chief consequences of the “total approach” to the Holographic Principle are: We are one. Inherently, we are the Primordial Oneness, God. And yes, we are responsible for the whole of Existence.
Layers of Holographic Reality
From our individual point of view, there are several layers of reality. Their main differentiating characteristics is the level of apparent influence we usually exert on them. Beyond our inner world, in the external world, first, there is our physical body. It is an intersection between inner and outer reality. It actually belongs to the external reality, but our mind is deeply attached to it. It represents the first and closest layer to our inner being. Seemingly, we have a robust, continuous, and decisive influence on this part of our reality. Then there are people and circumstances we are surrounded with: family, home, friends, co-workers, various life events, accidents, etc. Typically, we exert occasional but considerable influence on these people and events. Going further on, we experience our wider environment – neighborhood, broader organization/company we are working at, many acquittances, and so on. This environment is whatever we have some slight or rare influence on. Then there are social and global events around us. We perceive almost zero influence by us on those people or events. The layers are shown in the figure below.
Now, let's take a look at each layer from another angle. What exactly is mirrored in those layers? What is the practical value of recognizing them?
Here are some insights on each of the layers:
“Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment.” ― Rumi
Can you remember how much you were afraid of the dark during your childhood? Can you still feel the fear of monsters that were lurking from that darkness? Although those monsters do not exist, the fear still does. It is our fear of the Unknown. It is one of the greatest obstacles to our inner freedom. It forces us to contract into our well-known boundaries, to deny the opportunities that lie beyond our everyday life, to renounce our inherent, natural powers. The Unknown is everything we are unconscious of. There is a vast field of reality that we are aware of, and that is known to us. The rest is the Unknown. At least it seems so. The Unknown is everything we are unconscious of.
Change
Every single time I had a difficult period in my life, it was before a significant change. The old structures were beginning to crumble and transform into something new. Understandably, they were trying to survive, and the result was always suffering. The old structures always have a lot of inertia which resists any change. But what is inertia whatsoever? It is our fear of the Unknown! And physical inertia (mass) is merely a material representation of that fear within our perceived world. Every change leads to the Unknown. If we fear the Unknown, we fear the change; we perceive the Unknown as a threat. That’s why darkness is so menacing. But it’s only that which we are unconscious of, what is not lit up by our consciousness. When we feel threatened by the Unknown, we limit our consciousness of expanding. We don’t allow ourselves to evolve. The Unknown is not a threat - it’s an opportunity. It’s the only real possibility for expansion of consciousness. When we feel threatened by the Unknown, we limit our consciousness of expanding.
Opening
We must open ourselves to the Unknown, completely. We must believe it. Only then we will unlock our full potential. We have to embrace and accept the Unknown since it is our true necessity. We need it if we want to evolve. We need it if we want to live a happy, fulfilling life. The Unknown has to become an integral part of our lives. We should accept everything with a sense of awe, with a sense of freshness and novelty, like we’ve known absolutely nothing about it. When we say “I don’t know,” we enter Pure consciousness. Just Presence. Our mind does not “know,” but our consciousness is fully present. This proves that the Unknown is not a threat. On the contrary, it’s divine. It brings us into Presence, without thoughts. However, the apparent boundary between the conscious and the unconscious, between the Known and the Unknown, is false. Ultimately, our consciousness is not “our” at all. It is present everywhere and anytime. But when we claim it for “ourselves,” we constrict it to our “boundaries.” Ultimately, that is an illusion. How to Embrace the Unknown? For this purpose, an ideal approach would be one of the basic Reintegration techniques, called the “Freshness & Acceptance” (FA). It is straightforward: 1. Freshness--perceive the content as though it is entirely new to you. 2. Acceptance--fully accept the content with all of your heart. You will know you’ve done so when you have neither adherence nor aversion toward it. So, you notice something within yourself or outside of you, and observe it as an innocent child. Feel the awe of a kid seeing something entirely new. Accept the experience totally, be fine with it. Then go even deeper. Open yourself to the Unknown completely. Have faith in the Unknown and the hidden forces behind it. Remember that everything happens ultimately for good. If you believe in God and angels, have faith in their guidance and love. If you don't, just be aware of an infinite consciousness which is behind the Unknown in the same way as it is behind the Known, and which ennobles anything beyond your sight. Place yourself in a state of pure Not-knowing toward the experience. Just feel that you know nothing about that and be okay with that. Feel that you don't know anything about its possible outcomes, too. You know nothing about the future, and that’s absolutely fine. Accept your ignorance. Just feel at the moment that you literally know nothing and be OK with that. You will enter a state of pure consciousness. Practice this as an exercise as much as possible. Meanwhile, do not underestimate the power of love and forgiveness. They will further weaken and diminish your fear of the Unknown. Forgive yourself. Love yourself. You deserve that. Forgive all other beings that were involved in the situation of your interest. Forgive them deeply and compassionately. Love them, like you love your child, brother, sister or pet, unconditionally and wholeheartedly. Place yourself in a state of pure Not-knowing toward the experience. Just feel that you know nothing about that and be okay with that.
With love in your heart, you will easily open yourself to the vast fields of the Unknown. Love itself will lead you and will be an immense protective force as well. You will also unlock your creativity and deeply hidden virtues. You may uncover the inner powers, and even experience the Ultimate Truth within yourself. Eventually, you may become free from suffering.
We all want to be happy and to avoid suffering. These are the two tendencies that characterize the entire living world. Every life form will strive to satisfy its needs and thus be content, but also to avoid any form of suffering.
Although being self-aware and highly intelligent, we humans are also unable to avoid pain. Whether it be physical or emotional, pain is inevitable even to the most mature or spiritually developed people. However, Buddhism claims that one can become entirely free from suffering. That final stage of human existence is being called Nirvana, or Enlightenment. It is not our topic here, at least directly. Still, if we cannot completely transcend suffering, at least we can diminish it. I will describe here instructions for dealing with various difficulties. These guidelines are based on three stages related to the hardship:
Note that it’s essential for your inner work to accurately recognize at which stage you are at that point in time. Here are the three-stage instructions: 1. Prevention - the crucial stage In your normal, everyday life conditions, in which you don’t feel any pain or suffering, you must take some time for the work on yourself. It is not only the work on preventing the hardships; it is rather the work for achieving inner transformation in a positive sense. In other words, we must face the negativities of our life, but it is not good to focus on them too often and too much. We could define it only as a preventive work, but that would imply avoiding something negative. Instead, to be more aimed at a positive transformation, we will also call it the happiness work. It should include:
We must face the negativities of our life, but it is not good to focus on them too often and too much.
Meditation
This work should be well organized and scheduled. It would be great if you could create an everyday habit of meditating twice a day, at least 15 minutes in the morning and the same duration in the evening. These sitting sessions should be scheduled for the same periods of the day, if possible. This regular practice should also include loving-kindness meditation. It would be great if you could create an everyday habit of meditating twice a day, at least 15 minutes in the morning and the same duration in the evening.
There are countless types and variations of meditation out there. For example, you may practice vipassana, breath meditation, body awareness, walking meditation, pure awareness meditation, Kriya Yoga or something else. Or, you can concentrate your mind on something, e.g., on a single dot on the wall, on a figure of Buddha or another divine being, on a flame of a candle, etc.
However, the Reintegration System has several meditative practices to offer, too:
In all of these methods, you don’t ignore or suppress the emerging thoughts and emotions during the sitting. On the contrary, you reintegrate them entirely with your whole being. Check out the above links to learn how to meditate. An essential part of your sitting practice should be the loving-kindness meditation. So, don’t forget to include at least 5 minutes of this practice into your regular meditation sittings, preferably at the end of each. An essential part of your sitting practice should be the loving-kindness meditation.
Meditation brings you:
These are not claims; these are the facts. Scientific research has confirmed them, and you can check it out on the Internet and numerous scientific magazines. What’s more important for some practitioners, meditation, together with mindfulness, will expand your consciousness and can ultimately lead you to spiritual liberation or enlightenment. The veils of ignorance and suffering will gradually (or even suddenly) lift up, and you will eventually experience Pure Consciousness as a permanent state of being. Mindfulness Another vital part of your regular happiness work is mindfulness. It simply means to live in the present moment consciously. If you want to be mindful, you will have to do any activity in such a way that you are fully conscious of yourself and of the activity itself. Although many people don’t consider mindfulness as strictly spiritual, it is indeed a spiritual practice. It leads you to your True nature while dissolving your inner conflicts softly and imperceptibly. Moreover, conscious moments in the Now will gradually accumulate and make your whole life easier. When mindfulness becomes your natural way of living, you will enjoy every task; you will become light and, in a strange way, even transparent. You will start sensing some inexplicable joy and deep inner peace. You will feel love more and more, both for yourself and for people around you. Mindfulness will abate or even prevent challenges. |
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