There are many situations where you are trying to relax, meditate, of focus on a serious task, but fail to even begin with it, due to numerous distracting thoughts usually mixed up with unpleasant emotions. If you find yourself in this state of mind, struck by a continuous avalanche of thoughts and emotions, you can apply this simple method: pick up only one physical sensation that you are sensing at that moment, and concentrate on it. You will calm down immediately.
Usually, only 10 to 20 seconds of such focused attention will be enough to calm your mind and relax your body.
Pick up only one physical sensation that you are sensing at that moment, and concentrate on it. You will calm down immediately.
Now let us pass through an example of a real situation.
So, you are thinking now about some problem. Various thoughts are coming and going, grasping your whole attention, engaging and even possessing your whole being, moment after moment. You have identified with those thoughts and emotions completely and have forgotten of all else around yourself. It lasts for minutes, perhaps even for hours. Being overwhelmed with the problem, you can’t relax, can’t get enough rest and sleep. Simply put, you are unaware of your unawareness.
Suddenly, you are finally becoming aware that you are thinking too much, out of balance, out of here and now. You are seizing that moment immediately and deciding to calm down and become mindful. It is not a problem because you have this effective technique at your disposal.
In an instant, you are becoming conscious of numerous sensations within your body. You feel your inner body – your head, arms, legs, stomach, chest, but these sensations are somehow too stretched and vague. You then become aware of many other sensations: the sense of touching the chair by your backside; the sensation of touching the lap by your hands; mutual contact of your fingers; the sense of air gently touching the inner tissues of your nose; the contact between various parts of your clothes and skin; and many more.
You pick up only one of all these sensations, quickly, without any thinking about it. This time, you choose the sensation of your forefinger’s contact with your lap. Then you simply concentrate on that sensation. You just keep it in your conscious focus as long as possible. You don’t think about it. You don’t estimate it. You are just noticing the perception of your index finger touching the lap, continuously. If some thought or other sensation arises and disrupts you, you just gently return to the sensation.
After only 10 to 20 seconds, your mind becomes completely calm. Also, your body is becoming relaxed to some extent. Now, you are ready to meditate or do whatever is needed at that moment, in a much more effective way.
This was only an example of a real situation and one of the ways of doing this technique. You can be in some totally different situation, you can feel some other types of sensations and you can choose a different one to concentrate upon, but the most important thing is to focus on only one physical sensation, at least for several seconds.
This technique will only prepare you for a meditation session, or mindfulness practice. If you are determined to solve the problem of overthinking in your whole life and to achieve the permanent transformation of your life, you will need to make a serious plan of inner work and to stick with it firmly.
Now, your mind is relatively calm. You can continue with a concentration practice or meditate. But be aware that this is not a permanent solution to your anxiety or restless mind. This technique will only prepare you for a meditation session, or mindfulness practice. If you are determined to solve the problem of overthinking in your whole life and to achieve the permanent transformation of your life, you will need to make a serious plan of inner work and to stick with it firmly.
But don’t worry. There are plenty of ways to do that. The Reintegration System is one of them and the most of its material is available for free, on our website.
Conspiracies do exist. There are many governmental or non-governmental entities which jobs are tightly related to hidden activities. Secret agencies, cover-ups, industrial espionage…those things definitely exist, with many secret agendas accompanied with them.
However, many people believe in a more sinister, universal conspiracy. They are sure that all of us are monitored and even controlled by some super-secret, completely hidden para-governmental organizations or even alien beings.
When you delve into these teachings, you will find that they are sometimes very persuasive, filled with countless examples and logical connections. But there are simply too many of those theories. When you compare them, you will inevitably find their mutual inconsistency or even total disagreement. What’s wrong? Unfortunately, they are typically driven by human inner flaws.
The two main forces that drive people toward conspiracy theories are curiosity and the victim mentality. There is no doubt that curiosity is a positive thing. Nevertheless, in this case, it may lead you to facing your own victim mentality in its worst form.
Why are Some People Attracted by Conspiracies?
I don’t want to judge people. All these assumptions and conclusions in this article are more or less general. However, in my experience, people who believe in some sorts of conspiracies are not always mentally stable and realistic. Here’s why.
The problematic roots within human nature that lead to immersing into conspiracy theories can be boiled down to the following behaviors and traits:
Victim Identity and Rejecting the Responsibility
Let’s consider the victim identity as one of the main causes of accepting the conspiracy theories. Similar conclusions can also be derived for the ego-play and mistrustfulness.
The gravitational pull of the victim identity is a very dangerous thing. When it succeeds to grasp an individual’s mind (and it happens typically during the childhood), it typically grows ever stronger, as the person’s warped beliefs are re-enforcing themselves all the time. Those beliefs, such as “I’m the victim of a conspiracy,” “I’m so brave and they are attacking me because of that,” “I’m their enemy because I know what they are doing to us,” and so on, are actually attracting pertinent real-life situations.
What’s happening in the background? The conspiracy theorist has already fallen into the victim mentality. He or she is already used to accusing other people of his/her own problems or failures. They almost always think that somebody else is responsible for their suffering. It is the main framework of their personality. That was their favorite way of defense during the childhood – whatever bad happens, they used to reject their responsibility. By acting this way, they were trying to gain their parents’ love and acceptance. The worst thing is that they have continued with this behavior in their adulthood, although the causes of such conduct have been completely moved to their subconscious. That part of their personality is still very active, as it needs to “feed” on some outer situations, in order to confirm itself, to live on and even grow. Consequently, those people subconsciously radiate a specific negative energy that attracts related people or circumstances.
Whenever you are accusing someone else of your problems, be it your family member or a secret organization, even when they really infringe you, you are renouncing your own responsibility for your life.
Note: if you are having a strong, negative emotional response to this text, with thoughts like “this is so stupid,” “I’m not a weak person,” “this guy must be working for them, because he is trying to denounce people like me,” or similar, please think again! This is the sure sign that there are strong subconscious structures mentioned above, long-forgotten and suppressed into the depths of your mind.
Still, you may acknowledge the existence of conspiracies, especially if such things really have happened to you. Yet, whenever you are accusing someone else of your problems, be it your family member or a secret organization, even when they really infringe you, you are renouncing your own responsibility for your life. You are putting yourself into a weak position, in which others have control over your life, not you.
The Way Out
However, let us assume that there are indeed some real cases of attacks by secret agencies or alien abductions. If you are one of these people, how can you deal with these experiences? Apparently, they have access to all information they need, they usually have highly advanced technology which is being used for their sinister actions, they are cunning and all-pervasive. You feel hopeless.
How can you escape and regain your freedom? Is it possible? Yes, it is.
Remember, YOU are responsible for your own individual reality. Believe me, it is completely and absolutely true, without any exception. The Holographic Principle also points out to that. All problems and challenges that you are facing are rooted in you. You are involved in relationships with beings that are perfectly aligned with your inner subconscious expectations and suppressed traits. However, if you remove these roots of outer problems, if you re-integrate and transform your victim identity, mistrust and vanity, you will get out of reach of those negative beings, energies and situation. They will simply not be able to harm you anymore.
But how to do that?
First, you must forgive them. Yes, forgiveness is extremely important. But it cannot be forced from outside, from your mind. It can only come from within, spontaneously, from your heart. And that’s not easy.
There are two levels of forgiveness. The first is when you are trying to forgive somebody through your mind, just by thoughts. You will never succeed in that, as you have to forgive directly from your heart. One of those approaches is also the so-called “quantum forgiveness,” when people are trying to forgive with a help of the assumption that the bad deed had actually never happened, as the only reality is God, and everything else ultimately isn’t real. That, in fact, may be true, but such a knowledge must come from the heart.
However, there are people who are trying to forgive others by true assumptions on others’ deeds: the wrong-doing people simply aren’t aware that they are doing the wrong thing. Even if they were aware of that, still, they are always forced to do such things by their inner subconscious structures that have overwhelmed their being. Those structures, such as negative beliefs, traumas, anger toward others, resentment and so on, have typically been inflicted to them in their childhood, by their parents or peers. They simply couldn’t behave differently.
That’s true, and all of us have to have this in mind. Sometimes it does happen that people forgive just by repeatedly reminding themselves “It wasn’t personal, he didn’t know what he was doing.” But this must really touch their hearts, otherwise in their hearts could remain some leftovers of resentment and anger which can develop one day again.
Only the forgiveness from your heart will really free you.
The second level of forgiveness is the true forgiveness. It spontaneously arises from the heart. Normally, it is a consequence of a serious spiritual or psychological work (which is ultimately the same). It is not a product of a conscious decision to forgive someone because “they didn’t really mean to” or “didn’t know what they were doing” or “they couldn’t act differently.” Only the forgiveness from your heart will really free you.
You are in charge. You need to take back the responsibility for your life. You should put yourself back into the deciding position, the position of true power. But first, please face the truth: you have to do a lot of inner work. Nevertheless, the reward is invaluable: when you remove the roots of your outer challenges, all those negative people and circumstances will either be transformed or will leave your life forever.
To do so, there are countless techniques, scientific methodologies and spiritual paths at your disposal. One of them is the Reintegration System, and you can find some techniques here on this website for free. I believe those techniques will be enough for your work.
Do not lie to yourself, that’s the pre-condition. Define your main areas to work on and set the priorities. Make a plan. Be persistent in your work. You will not only reveal directly the really hidden truth about the world, which is unimaginably more magnificent than all the conspiracy theories together, but you will find the end of your suffering and the beginning of the deepest Joy.
Have a great day and a peaceful life. :-)
Imagine trying to live without air. Now imagine something worse. ― Amy Reed, Clean
Almost all of us have one or more friends who have suffered from addictions. Whether it be drugs, alcohol, or something else, those are often very sad stories full of extreme hardships and adversities, not only for those who are direct victims of the addiction but to their whole families and friends.
What can we do about it?
Apparently, as individuals, we cannot do much, but every honest contribution to this battle is still extremely valuable when we consider the harshness of the consequences of these behaviors.
However, the joint approach is vital in this field. We must unite our efforts if we really want to make a change on the global level.
But what are we fighting against? What or who are our enemies? Can we fight them outwardly or is that an inner battle? What are our goals in that battle, and do we have the tools for achieving them?
And finally, should we talk about fighting or inner transformation?
What is an Addiction?
First, we have to be clear what is an addiction per se. We can define it as a compulsive behavior which is expressed through seeking and using various substances or engaging in various activities that are often detrimental to one’s psychological or physiological health.
In accordance with that, we can say that there are two basic types of addictions:
We are all aware of the gravity of substance addictions. But we must not underestimate the seriousness of the behavioral addictions too, as all compulsive behaviors are deeply engraved into the neurological structure of our brains and have strong habitual forces behind them.
All compulsive behaviors are deeply engraved into the neurological structure of our brains and have strong habitual forces behind them.
In order to get a deeper understanding of those forces and why people are so prone to relapses of old addictions, we should take a look on numerous invisible background energies.
Spiritual View on Addictions
The highest states of Being (Peace, Joy, and Love) have their degraded forms: Love in its degraded form is infatuation or obsession; Peace in its degraded form is drugs and alcohol; Joy in its degraded forms is sensual bodily pleasures. Through addictive substances or behaviors, people are actually trying to achieve, at least temporarily, these highest states of Being. Sadly, by using the wrong means and while having many misconceptions and limited views on reality.
Addictions are entities that are conscious to some extent and are very cunning.
But there is another aspect of this problem, which is often hidden from our knowledge. These addictions are entities that are conscious to some extent and are very cunning. Here’s how.
Like attracts like. Positive energies or things attract energies or things of their kind, and the same stands for negative energies. Pertaining to human personality, negative energies and experiences tend also to coalesce into an ever-bigger energetic entity. We call these entities morphogenetic (morphic) fields or pendulums. And yes, there are such fields linked to every addiction. They exist and grow in individuals, groups, or even in the whole humanity, on a collective level. They are living beings, with some level of self-consciousness and even intelligence. Normally, we are not aware of their existence at all, due to our severely limited perception of reality.
Energies and experiences tend to coalesce into an ever-bigger energetic entity. We call these entities morphogenetic (morphic) fields or pendulums. And yes, there are such fields linked to every addiction.
The morphic fields have a strong tendency to survive and grow. They feed on energies of their similar kind. When they are “hungry” (with low energy level), to get enough “food”, these entities will always try to induce positive or negative psychological states or external events (depending on their own nature), as they feed themselves with the same sorts of energies.
In this case, we must deal with addictions. Obviously, they have very “negatively” oriented energies in their background.
What’s very important, we must not directly fight negative morphic fields, as that will only give them an additional momentum, and that’s the reason why we can call them pendulums.
One of the ways to stop the pendulum’s swinging is to be present during its activity and consciously ignore generated negativity, something like being transparent. If we were persistent each time in this, that specific morphic field will finally abandon our individual life.
There are countless types of morphic fields. For example, there are morphic fields of every family, a group of people, sports clubs, societies, organizations, companies, countries, nations, state administration, schools, religions, animal species, specific human behaviors, emotions of all kinds, diseases, and so forth. So, there are also very strong morphic fields of addictions, too.
As said before, they are cunning and seductive in their striving to achieve their goals. They often induce specific accidents and stressful situations or use people in the person’s surroundings and even his or her friends to incite the addictive behavior or to re-establish it again.
The negative elements of our personality are kind of pendulums’ “agents” inside us. Pendulums mirror our internal challenges. When we succeed in reintegrating our negative personal parts, we actually leave the pendulums without their roots in our being. They can’t influence us anymore since they are just outer projections of our inner negative elements.
When we succeed in reintegrating our negative personal parts, we actually leave the pendulums without their roots in our being.
Two Aspects of Addictions
Every addiction is an individual’s (unconscious) escape from pain into a relative certainty of the temporary relief provided by the addictive substance or behavior. That pain often goes along problems with mental health.
According to reports published in the Journal of the American Medical Association, 53 percent of people who abuse drugs and 37 percent who abuse alcohol are also suffering from mental health disorders. Therefore, all issues should be treated simultaneously.
There are two aspects of addictions: mental and physiological.
 Originally, morphogenetic field is a biological concept (see https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morphogenetic_field), but Rupert Sheldrake, British biologist and author, extended it to mind and even social groups and patterns of behavior (see http://www.sheldrake.org/research/morphic-resonance/introduction).
 More on morphic fields: https://www.re-integration.com/morphic-fields.html
 Addiction is common in people with mental health problems
According to reports published in the Journal of the American Medical Association:
 More on habits and the so-called habit loop you can find at: https://www.re-integration.com/habits.html
 One of the main reasons is called dopamine. Research on the brain indicates that addiction is about powerful memories, and recovery is a slow process in which the influence of those memories is diminished. Both addictive drugs and highly pleasurable or intense experiences (such as a life or death thrill, a crime, or an orgasm) trigger the release of the brain chemical dopamine, which in turn creates a reward circuit in the brain. This circuit registers that intense experience as "important" and creates lasting memories of it as a pleasurable experience. Dopamine changes the brain on a cellular level, commanding the brain to "do it again," which heightens the possibility of relapse even long after the behavior (or drug) has stopped. Dopamine also helps to explain why intense experiences can be just as addictive as drugs.
Recovery depends on treating both the addiction and the mental health problem!
Remember, recovery depends on treating both the addiction and the mental health problem! That is why a combined treatment is the best solution.
Three Stages of Addiction that Should Be Considered for any Treatment
1. Pre-addictive period – preventative measures:
2. Acute addiction period
Generally speaking, although in real life we cannot expect too much of a strong will or discipline of the addicted person, it is still absolutely necessary and possible to do some transformational work.
Unquestionably, the focus must be on your honesty toward yourself first. That will inevitably lead you to acknowledge the necessity of a strict medical treatment. You must get yourself out of the claws of that addiction first.
The focus must be on your honesty toward yourself first.
However, do not neglect your inner work, even in the middle of the addiction period. Here are some suggestions that might be working for you:
Remember: apply a strong medical treatment, and your inner work (with the Reintegration System or any other contemporary spiritual or psychological methodology) will support your treatment greatly.
3. Post-addiction period
This is the detoxication period when you also have to ensure that you’ll never return to the addiction.
Comprehensive Strategy for Overcoming Addictions
Here are some pieces of advice for a comprehensive strategy for dealing with acute addictions.
1. Recognize your addiction. (Applicable to acute addiction period and to some extent to pre-addictive period as well.) You must be absolutely honest with yourself. Ask yourself these questions:
The more “yes” answers you have had, the more you should be concerned about the potential issue with an addiction.
2. Make a firm decision to overcome your addiction. (Applicable to acute addiction period and to some extent to pre- and post-addiction periods as well.)
One trick to help with your decision is to draw up a contract with yourself. Take a piece of paper and write down a statement in which you are firmly promising yourself that you will fully implement your decision and achieve all your goals you set ahead. Don’t forget to sign the contract. It will serve you as a valuable subconscious bond to your practice.
3. Ask for help of your family members or friends. (Applicable to acute addiction period and to some extent to post-addiction period as well.)
Ask your dear ones for support, for their opinions and ideas on how to solve the problem. When you get low-spirited and want to give up (which will surely happen), others will encourage and support you. This kind of help is invaluable.
4. Make a strategic plan with goals, deadlines and concrete actions. (Applicable to acute addiction period.)
The goals should be specific and measurable, i.e. the start date of your actions and limits on your drug use each day (of course, first consult the medical authority).
This plan should also include your firm commitment to:
5. Make a daily schedule of your activities. (Applicable to all addiction periods.)
That schedule might be different for work days, weekends and vacation days. Moreover, it’ll depend on which addiction period you are in now. Nevertheless, try to make the work on yourself habitual, but don’t forget to enrich it with some creative work, whether in a fixed time window or as a flexible task.
The schedule should encompass these activities:
First, you relax completely, using either the Relax to Reintegrate technique described on this website or some other procedure that works for you. It is strongly recommended that you sit with your spine straight up, whether on a chair or in one of the “lotus” positions. Whether you keep your eyes open or closed depends on your preference, but I would suggest doing the meditation with half-open eyes, to keep yourself awake more easily.
Entering the state of Presence:
In this stage, you are shifting from a normal state of consciousness, with a lot of thoughts, emotions and other mind content, into a deeper, meditative state, which is less “contaminated” with the content of the mind. To reach that state, we should dissolve our identification with the mind content (thoughts, emotions, bodily sensations or impressions from our surroundings, whatever is occupying our attention at the moment). You may do this very effectively with only one or two applications of the Dissolving the Temporary I (DTI) technique of the Reintegration System. It will bring you into a deep, thoughtless state, called Presence, quickly and easily.
Occasional removal of distracting mind content:
Of course, this state of Presence won’t last forever. In fact, it’ll probably last from 10 to 20 seconds.
When the first thought or emotion arises, just accept it, wholeheartedly, without any resistance. (Remember that you are accepting the situation or person which that thought or emotion is related to. You are not accepting the notion of the thought or emotion, but what they represent, what they are related to.)
Then you fully accept yourself, your whole being, as you feel it at that moment.
Finally, feel love toward yourself. Tell silently: “I love myself.” If you cannot feel love, no matter, don’t force anything.
Then go back to your state of Presence. Be here and now. When the next mind content arises, do the same: 1) accept it, 2) accept yourself and 3) love yourself. Return to Presence again. And so on, until the end of your meditation sitting.
Be here and now. When the next mind content arises, do the same: 1) accept it, 2) accept yourself and 3) love yourself.
If any of the mind content is very strong and/or repetitive, write it down and return to your meditation. You will deal with it later with the Inner Triangle technique.
Just stay in your upright position and do this:
1. Move the center of your being into your Heart.
Repeat and feel the following loving-kindness phrases:
2. Think of someone for whom you have very warm and loving feelings. This can be a parent, friend, partner, sibling or even a pet.
Repeat and feel the same loving-kindness phrases toward that being:
3. Think of someone for whom you have neutral feelings. This can be an acquaintance, a neighbor, or even a person you know of from the media. Repeat and feel the same loving-kindness phrases from the previous steps for this person.
4. Think of someone for whom you have negative feelings. Repeat and feel the same loving-kindness phrases for this person as well.
5. Radiate loving kindness to all beings in the Existence. Repeat and feel the loving-kindness phrases for all beings.
Or, you can do this:
Imagine that a little child, or toddler, is approaching you. It’s smiling innocently at you, wobbling in its walking. It’s so cute, with bright, smiling eyes staring at you. The child is giggling with its sweet voice, telling you “I love you!” You are embracing it with warmth. How couldn’t you feel Love toward such an innocent being? Let loving kindness rush out from your Heart.
When you open your Heart, let Love fill you completely. Extend it also to yourself. Love yourself with your whole Heart! Feel that you deserve the deepest Joy and Happiness. After all, you have always been giving the best you could. You, as that child, need only to be happy. You only want to be happy in your life and you definitely deserve that! Love yourself, your body, and your whole being. Wish yourself all the best.
Love all parts of your being and personality, all traits, flaws, mistakes, and imperfections; love the body that has served you so dutifully your whole lifetime; love your life, your past, present and future, anything that comes to your mind.
Let Love amplify and expand to encompass all people around you. Love your family, your children, spouse, parents, friends, colleagues; love your job, your errands and annoying things; love your enemies, too; let Love pour out from your Heart toward all of them. Extend your Love to all humanity. Feel yourself as a part of it. Love your darling pets; love all animals, plants and all living beings. Love your Mother Earth, the entire Universe, the entire Existence. Feel the fact that countless beings exist within Creation, and all of them are trying to be happy in some way. Wish them all true happiness with your whole Heart.
This is Love and it is miraculous. It can potentially heal, harmonize and mature everything. Try not to expect healing, but love yourself and all beings around you. If the healing should come, it will come, to both you and inevitably those around you. Something wonderful will surely happen, although you cannot know what it will be.
Love is miraculous. It can potentially heal, harmonize and mature everything.
 Source: “Substance Abuse and Mental Health Issues” article on helpguide.org.
 You can learn the powerful Inner Triangle technique from “Inner Peace, Outer Success.” Nevertheless, if you have a problem with addiction or any other emotional problem and cannot buy the book, feel free to contact the administrators of the Reintegration website and we will send it to you for free, as soon as possible.
 The word “Heart” here does not refer to the physical heart itself, nor to the left-of-chest physical location of the heart, but to the “I-point” area, where people usually point at with their forefinger when speaking about themselves in the first-person singular. That area is like an invisible circle, two or three inches wide, touching the skin from the inside. This Heart is extremely important in our lives—it is considered the true center of our being, the seat of the soul, and the source of love and energy.
The Heart sends into reality one’s specific vibration frequency, which is the sum of one’s beliefs, emotions and other patterns. The Heart is the source of our individual reality, and it’s crucial to comprehend and appreciate its importance in our lives.
It is also vital to have harmony between the Heart and the Mind.
 These protocols are very powerful. They have been thoroughly described in “Inner Peace, Outer Success” and “Inner Freedom Techniques.” Nevertheless, if you have a problem with addiction or any other emotional problem and cannot buy the books, feel free to contact the administrators of the Reintegration website and we will send you “Inner Peace, Outer Success” for free, as soon as possible.
 The Inner Polygram process (both One-Way and Two-Way Communication variations) have also been
described in “Inner Peace, Outer Success” and “Inner Freedom Techniques.”
For those of you who are “sober” and “clean” – your role in healing the world is as important as of all the others. You should work on yourself first, seeking for inner wisdom, love, and truth. Transform yourself, be compassionate, mindful and present, and that way you will subtly influence all people around you in the best possible way. All other actions, including the healing or charity work, will simply be a natural consequence of your inner truth.
For all of you with the addiction challenges: try to be as persistent as possible. Don’t expect instant results. And never give up. Relapses are inevitable and you must be prepared for them. The pendulums that we were talking about before, are very cunning entities and will do their best to get you back into their “possession.”
But remember, you are in charge. Your external reality, all your joys and sorrows, friends and opponents, feats and diseases – stem from yourself, from your inner world and subconscious structures. That’s why we are responsible for our lives. Not the other people, nor circumstances. Only us.
You are in charge. Your external reality, all your joys and sorrows, friends and opponents, feats and diseases – stem from yourself, from your inner world and subconscious structures.
You must take the responsibility for your whole life! That’s the ultimate lesson, together with Love, not only for those who have challenges with addictions – that’s the most important lesson for all of us. When you take the full responsibility for your life, believe me, you will start enjoying immense freedom.
You can change yourself and you will indeed change your whole world. There are many people out there who succeeded in this. You will be among them!
Good luck! :-)
 Check out our partner website http://seekhealing.org and support their noble project at https://www.generosity.com/community-fundraising/end-the-opioid-addiction-crisis-rethink-rehab/x/16773004
Author: Jane Bolto
With a background in Marketing, Jane Bolto currently works as a Content Specialist at Nybizdb.com. Always willing to share her passion for new marketing strategies.
Finding balance in life is incredibly important. One of the secrets to finding happiness is capturing that balance, so that everything in life is steady and even. You should never be too stressed, too worried, too angry, too hurt. These things need to be addressed before you can find happiness. Here’s how a meditation retreat helped me to find that balance, and to understand how it makes a real difference to life.
The first thing that I learned was that physical balance is an important foundation. When you sit in your meditation pose, you should always find a comfortable balance. You should sit neither hunched forward, nor leaning back. You should not tilt to one side or the other. When you take your seat, gently rock your body around until you find that exact middle point. You will feel the tension flowing out of your body as you find your centre. If you cannot get your physical balance right, it is very difficult to let go of physical concerns and detach your mind. If you can’t do that, then mental balance is nearly impossible.
Once I had my posture balanced, I needed to think about my emotions. When your emotions are running high, it’s difficult to concentrate. Like all things, emotions should be approached in moderation. Suffering and happiness do not come from others, they come from within yourself. Therefore, you should not attach too much importance to emotional connections. Settle your mind with the forgiveness of others. Make a prayer or wish that everyone may be free from suffering, may have happiness, may treat one another equally, and may find enlightenment. With this thought in your mind, you can erase emotions like hate, anger, jealousy, and so forth. Holding on to a grudge will unbalance your emotions very quickly.
Now, with our emotions relaxed and balanced, we were able to learn about balancing our minds. Mindfulness will help you to achieve this balance. Be aware of how you are feeling. Are you sleepy? Then you should make an effort to wake yourself up and stay alert. Are you feeling excited? Then make an effort to calm down and become relaxed. You should be able to achieve a perfect mental balance over time. This is when you are relaxed without being sleepy, and alert without being tense. You are aware of things around you, but you do not allow them to interrupt your balance. Achieving this balance may take a lot of effort, and at first you may not be able to hold it for a long time. The aim of meditation is to let go of everything else, until you are in that perfect state.
Finally, it was time to think about how this applies to everyday life. Even when not meditating, it is possible to apply these principles to find balance. Letting go of grudges and moving with the flow will help hugely in this regard. You can also bring more balance into your life with mental awareness. If you realise that you are often tired, you should cut down on activities or increase your sleep. If you are often too tense, find activities to help you relax. A balanced life is a far happier one than an unbalanced life.